Friday, April 14, 2006

And then there were none ...

I taught my last class today. I don't even know how to feel about it. I know that it is probably not the last time I'll ever teach, but for sure one of the last times I'll teach in a foreign language. I am going to miss the students. I am going to miss watching them learn and better understand English. There are students who understood nothing at the beginning of the year who are bilingual now. I don't even remember when it happened; when they started being able to understand everything I was saying.

Mind you, there are still some groups that I have to repeat everything for, and some groups were already really well off when I got here, but this is different. I hope they write. It is obviously hard to take all of their addresses so I can write to them - which ones would want letters anyway? But it will be good to see who took advantage of my address and then correspond with them.

I think the hardest part about teaching is probably the end of the year. You let the students go into a vacation of whatever and hope that what you have given them sticks. I'd like to imagine that none of them would forget anything, but that is a little unrealistic. I say this because there are sure to be things I forget too. But I don't ever want to forget this feeling, this idea, this emotion: I have done my absolute best to present myself, my education, and my country to high school students and staff for seven months. I hope they feel like I've done a good job. I hope they remember just that.

I guess you never really want to say goodbye to something that you love, but you have to - you have to make room for the new and exciting thing that is coming next. In my case, I am exceptionally lucky to know that what is coming next is going to be another big thing. Moving away and moving on are a part of life ... an important part. So why is it so hard to do?

"It's the hard that makes it good. If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it."
~Jimmy Dugan (Tom Hanks) in A League of Their Own

Too bad there isn't going to be a fairytale ending. But I guess the good news is that if it isn't a fairytale yet, it must not be the end.

"To live will be an awfully big adventure."
~Peter Pan (Robin Williams)

I'm going out in the courtyard to spend as much time as I can soaking it in. Why don't you ever think to do that before the last few days? Love always, ~Heather

2 comments:

Arafel said...

ok, so why does it always happen like this ? After a few months of settling, meeting people and uses, you're already leaving us ?

It is never easy to say goodbye, especially for the shy guy I am, but I'm very pleased to have seen you today, I would have been very disapointed to let you leave without - at least- telling you how happy I am to have met you. And even then, I haven't said half I had to say...

mhm, isn't this comment a little melodramatic ? Well it is, and I don't care.

I miss you already ,

Gashwin said...

Heather -- prayers and best wishes for the transition. I am in a similar place, leaving my home for the past 11 years ... and transitioning to something new and exciting and at the same time terrifying and unknown.

I am delighted to hear that you'll be in DC. I'll be there, God willing, after the end of August. We should meet up!