So most of my excitement about staying in town this weekend revolved around preparing for the Caroling Party. I baked like a fiend, cleaned the apartment, did some gardening (which no one can ever see because all our parties are at night, but whatever - I like it), and finished my laundry and such.
The party was super. Not everyone could make it (which was a bummer), but the people who came were amazingly fun. We ate an inordinate amount of baked goods (and I also made people take tons home) had an actual fire that lasted, drank cocoa, watched the original cartoon version of How the Grinch Stole Christmas, and sang a bunch of songs. Some notable classics were the "Twelve Days of Christmas," acted out respectively by each individual; "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" which was making us laugh so hard Dana had to stop playing piano; and "Thirty Two Paws and Eight Little Tails," which was a song no one had ever heard before, but Dana and I think is hysterical.
Mike took tons of pictures and brough some killer pizza dip, Katie brought amazing quiche (for those with a more salty inclination), Kate brought mint glazed brownies with red sprinkles (totally festive), Christine brought toffee/saltines ... sooo good... and peanut butter cookies with Hershey's kisses, Lindsay brought leftover goodies from her party, and Dana and I had a spread of a bunch of other things out and about. We were not short of nourishment in the least bit.
So all went well. Christine got to poke (stoke) the fire, Dave wore his (now traditional) Santa hat, and everyone reminisced over 80's cartoons and video games. As things died down there was more piano playing of Nintendo game theme songs and Dana ran off to pack for Wisconsin.
And so went the Caroling Party. One of my friends stuck around until I found out whether or not I was going to have to pick my sister up at the airport. In the end, I didn't - which was okay. I am, in fact, still waiting to hear where she is - though I know she got in safely around 6am (text message).
The rest of this post is sort of going to be really vague and uninteresting to most of you, so I am not at all offended by you not reading past this point, especially if you have better things to do (I write to get it out of my system sometimes more than to actually inform people about what is going on). I'll be travelling tonight (hopefully), but should be able to catch up with you in NC tomorrow. Have a fabulous Wednesday ... less than a week until Christmas! Loveya, ~Heather
In the party aftermath, I was trying to avoid doing the dishes by any procrastination method possible. One of these was convincing my friend to stay and hang out even after I found out I didn't need them to keep me awake until 4:30 to go get my sister from the airport. This resulted in what I am now considering normal banter between the two of us, since most of our late night conversations seem to go this way. ("This way" means ridiculously as one or both of us is actually exhausted.) So anyway, in what I thought was a benign way, I made a request. Now as far as requests go, there are the spur of the moment ones and the planned ones. This was a combination effort, one part spontanaiety and the other part previously pondered. I must say that one or both of those things came out way less benign than I had been hoping for.
As I crawled into bed later, I couldn't help but think how stupid I must have sounded. After my friend called me on my dumb "word vomit," I tried to explain myself rather inarticulately. But I was suddenly reminded of the scene from Love Actually where the guy has all the posters and gives his Christmas message to Kiera Knightley's character. As I lay there snuggled into my down comforter, I realized I felt alot like that guy must have as he walked away. It was a combination between a sense of accomplishment at being honest when a lie would have made things a hell of alot better, uncertainty whether or not the person understood exactly how you were feeling, sadness that you were walking away from them, and gladness that it was finally over - there was a closure to it.
My request was significantly more friendly than the one in the film (which I had a hard time explaining because apparently, for a communications student, I still don't know how to use my words). And although I feel like I completely weirded my friend out (I'm obviously hoping I didn't), I'm not unhappy it happened. I was my usual pouty self for about three seconds until I realized that as friends, we had totally passed a test (my friend significantly moreso than I). There were four possible scenarios that could have played out, and this one was by far the best.
So now, as the character said, "enough." I can't worry about something that I can't change (it is highly impractical). If things can't ever be the same, then maybe it is a good thing and our friendship will just get stronger. I don't really believe there is any other option. Considering the fact that I have also said WAY stupider (I know it isn't a word) things before without major event is a good sign. (This one just came out wrong - every other time I have meant exactly what I said, and this time I meant something different than what I said, but it didn't sound that way ... oh goodness, if this is comprehensible to you, you are a better person than I).
I have alot of faith that this vacation is going to do alot in terms of relaxing me and letting my brain have a break. As Dana said yesterday, I need a vacation from my brain. But it sticks to me like glue, so that isn't going to happen. Plus, I am going to need all my faculties as it is a whole family home for the holidays Christmas ... our first in awhile. Pray for my brain to be functional during this time, please.
And to my friend (who probably wimped out on reading my rambling long ago, as I know they have better things to do - like watch my DVDs!), thanks for standing up for what you believe in. Although my intentions were slightly misconstrued, your explanation was valiant. But since you totally busted one of the throw pillows, I am more determined than ever to beat you at least once. Be afraid, be very afraid.
Okay, I really have to get ready for work and clean the apartment now. Ugh. Morning after party stuff kind of stinks. But a great party like that is worth it. Shower time. And I'll post pictures when I get them. Love always, ~Heather