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Decisions ...

...can be good or bad.

Like killing that strange bug on the ceiling with a newspaper at a bad angle and possibly having it land in my hair on its plummet to the carpet (where it was camouflaged and I was freaking out about it maybe being in my hair so I didn't see it land).

Right now, aside from the bug and newspaper incident, I am trying to decide a good number of things. One of which is where to live, who to live with, and how to go about having the conversations necessary to make those decisions. Townhouse, apartment, condo, north, west, red line, orange line, blue line, ack!

Another is how to handle my job situation. I love the idea of my job, but often find it less than challenging. I am trying to decide if this is something I can handle. I'm beginning to fill my life outside of work with challenging (if not, than time consuming) activities.

I'm playing on a competitive volleyball team one night a week - and I'll probably be doing some strategic coaching with that (since I am one of the more experienced people on the team). I am the co-program director for this year's Virginia HOBY seminar, which is a huge responsibility. I am writing a few new songs and more or less a completely new script to the musical I co-wrote for my senior thesis. I'll be stage managing for the Janney Elementary musical again this year (which means working in flex time).

I have plenty going on. But I'm not sure that loving the potential of my job and outside activities makes up for being less than intellectually stimulated at work. There are going to be big changes inside our organization soon which should mean more work - which is good. However, I don't want to confuse busy with challenging. If anyone has words of wisdom, I'd appreciate them now.

I refuse to believe you can't be completely happy in your job - since I have already experienced this in two jobs before this, I know it is possible. Even if you don't love all the elements, paperwork is worth it if you know that it is for/to document something relevant and important. But, like a mere acquaintance can become a great friend, can a job that doesn't take advantage of what I would consider my best talents develop into a meaningful position? I truly hope so.

I have other decisions to make too, like which of the four books I'm reading to dive into next, or what to do this weekend (aside from getting rid of this cold!).

I am an indecisive person when left to my own devices. I tend to make quicker decisions when I feel like I may run out of options. To maintain the standard that I rarely second guess and have a well-developed policy against regret, I agonize over making a decision in advance - until I am certain I have worked out every possible "reaction" to the action I choose. This is a characteristic about myself that typically serves me well, but is emotionally draining.

With all the decisions I need to make (some much sooner than later!) I think I am going to rely on something that Pritcher once commented to me (via blog): "God is strong enough for your questions."

I'll be sending them up with a healthy dose of prayer. Best of luck in your decision making!

Love always, ~Heather

Below: A picture a la Mom from a snowy, yet somehow warmer day on the Capitol steps in Washington, DC last winter.

Comments

MissEfish said…
I hope things work out with the job. (I've never been there since I keep avoiding the 'real world' as much as possible.) Is there someone you could talk to about maybe taking on some more responsibilities so that you feel it is a better use of your time? I'll keep you in my thoughts.

And if you're interested DC has a roller derby league. www.dcrollergirls.com. I don't think they have their 2008 season posted yet but one of our ladies practiced with them over Christmas break and said they were pretty amazing. I'm sure they'll have a few home bouts you can check out if you ever feel so inclined.

Take care!